Peak District Poetry

Here is a selection of the Peak District Poetry written for RAMSOC emails between April and June of 2018:

Peak District Poem – What is Sunday for if not for the Peaks?

What is Sunday for if not for the Peaks?

Where can I go after the Sunday next week?

Like a ramble in January my summer seems bleak,

What is Sunday for if not for the Peaks?

I suppose my Sunday is meant to be for church,

But where’s my sheep, beer, and sunshine? My oaks, fir and birch?

This Ramsoc hiatus has left my weekends in the lurch,

What is Sunday for? I’ll continue my search.

What is Sunday for? Perhaps I’ll try to study,

But without my fresh air, my brain is getting fuzzy

My walking boots look sad, all clean, no longer muddy.

I fear I cannot study ‘til I see my Sunday rambling buddies.

But in the quiet of the day I hear Wednesday squeak,

“You may not have found your Sunday but if it’s sun and fun you seek,

Play board games and visit a bouncy planet – havoc you may wreak,

And make sure to raise a glass to socials - your new hero is the midweek!”

So don’t worry – with us there’s always fun you can salvage,

And get ready for the big one in June, our Dark Peak Challenge! 

Royal Wedding Limerick

There once was a hiker called Harry,

On his sleeve his heart he would carry,

On a warm Dark Peak walk,

He and Meghan got to talk,

And soon, finally Prince Harry will marry! 

A Haiku, inspired by my discovery last year that walking socks exist, as in, socks specifically for walking. (what are all other socks for???)

Whole sheep on my feet

These socks cost more than Meg’s dress

And still they blister

Save the Bees

Save the bees,

Our fuzzy mates,

Who welcome me

At country gates

Save the bees

Whose buzzing keeps

Boredom away when

In it tries to creep

Save the bees

Whose honey sweetens my palate

I love it much more

Than my tuna salad

Save the bees

Don’t be a ninny

Don’t break the heart

Of my dear friend Winnie

Save the bees

It’s really groovy

But please don’t recreate

The Bee Movie

The Dark Peak Challenge

You’ve won the battle, but here’s the war:

Saving your body after climbing Mam Tor,**

And those 20-odd other miles in between,

Where you don’t remember applying sun cream.

Now you’re a lobster after its been thrown in the pot,

Blisters and burns and squeezable spots,

Aches and pains in god-knows where,

Don’t worry – I’ve got some questionable advice to share

If your skin is more scarlet than the letter,

Knit yourself an ice lolly sweater.

Or for something a little clearer,

Take a bath in aloe vera.

If getting rid of pain is what you’re about,

Try Jamie Oliver’s lemon and garlic pan-fried trout,

Or if you need more intense first aid,

Forget your troubles by watching Beyonce’s Lemonade,

Need something to soothe your quads?

Lie in the park and pet all the dogs

This Challenge has got you feeling Bake-unwell?

A six-pack of Mr Kiplings snack is the real healing spell.

But the real cure for Dark Peaks agony,

Is the knowledge that actually,

For the next twelve months you have nothing to fear,

Until the 2019 Dark Peak Challenge next year!